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No Time for Intimacy

Female complains of difficulties becoming aroused. Since having a child, she has lost interest in sex and finds her attention wanders too much to allow her to enjoy intercourse. She has begun having issues with dryness as well as general fatigue. What is the problem, and is there anything that can be done to help?

Case #: 1172

Concern:

I have a problem getting in the mood. When we first started dating and got married before the baby I never had a problem. I now have a hard time getting in the mood. I have too much swimming around in my head stress-wise with work (I am a nurse) and can't relax enough to concentrate on sex. I have a hard time remembering things at work, am forgetful with names even right after they have been given to me. Sometimes I have pain with intercourse but I contribute it to dryness. I have tried vitamin E, but that has not worked either. I am too tired to work out, which used to get me in the mood. What can I do to help?

Discussion:

There are two issues at work here. The first problem is your stress. Your highly demanding life is making high demands on your sex life. Cortisol is the hormone generated when you are in a stressful situation. Cortisol negatively impacts many aspects of a female’s body; it causes weight gain, fatigue, foggy-headedness, a disinterest in sex, and a lack of arousal. Unfortunately, there is not much you can do for excess cortisol, other than trying to control the triggers for it.

At this point in your life, I’d say there isn’t much you can remove from your life to make it less stressful, but there are techniques to help you put your mind in a less stressful place. I’ll go over these a little later. By taking steps to remove the cortisol from your body, you will regain a measure of your clear-headedness, lose your sleepiness, and find your way into happy sex again.

Hormones How?

Speaking of hormones, the second issue you’re having has to deal exclusively with your hormonal balance. Having a child can really alter your hormones, as I’m sure you know, but did you know exactly what it was capable of doing to you? Right now, it seems to me that your estrogen levels have been knocked out of whack, and that you’re experiencing excess progesterone.

No Estrogen, No Fun

The reason I believe this is due to some of the symptoms you’ve described to me. Estrogen levels are directly related to vaginal lubrication. Without enough estrogen, you’ll begin experiencing irritating vaginal dryness. Interestingly, depression, fatigue, stress are all linked to low levels of estrogen as well. It seems to me that your low estrogen levels could be triggering your mind to stress, resulting in a cortisol buildup, which is causing many of you other problems.

Herbal Restoration

What can you do to solve your problems? Number one, begin taking an herbal supplement that focuses on a healthy sex life. (TRY: Passion and Desire Ignition Remedy) The one I’m recommending contains herbs that are designed to increase libido, while also restoring healthy circulation and balance to your reproductive area.

Epimedium, also known as Horny Goat Weed, contains chemicals known as phytoestrogens, which act as false hormones (estrogen, testosterone, or progesterone) in your body. The hormones are completely degradable by the body, if the body doesn’t need the extra boost, but if it does, the chemicals are processed just as a normal hormone would be. It’s a safe way to increase your estrogen without worrying about cancer.

Take Time for Yourself

To protect yourself from a cortisol overdose, I highly recommend finding what relaxes you the most and focus on letting go of work whilst enjoying this relaxing pursuit. You need to take time for yourself—just you, not baby or daddy. Allowing your brain the space to process and compartmentalize the stressful events of the day will give your body the chance to relax and prepare for a happy, healthy intercourse.

I wish you the best in your passion pursuit!

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