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My Sexual Fantasies Will Curl Your Eyelashes

Have you ever had a naughty little notion that you were too afraid to tell your significant other about? It doesn't have to be an awkward situation. . .Trust me.

Case #: 1877

Concern：

I want to explore all of my sexual fantasies, but I'm shy. I know I shouldn't be, and I trust my boyfriend wouldn't laugh or freak out by my suggestions. I just don't know how to tell him that I want these things. Any way to start this conversation without an awkward silence at the end?

Discussion：

I'm a shy person. While I was still in school, I kept to myself. Sure, I had a great group of close-knit friends that I could trust, but that was where my out-going personality ended. If I trusted you, I would tell you everything. If we were acquaintances, I wouldn’t talk much. Even when it came to sex, I wasn’t always the sexual thrill seeker that I am today.

Too Shy To Function

Before I broke from my shell, I hardly told my boyfriend what I liked--let alone my fantasies. What changed? I’m not sure. Maybe it was our long-term relationship. Maybe it was the trust I held in him. Whatever the reason, I started to speak up.

The Talk

One night, I told my boyfriend one fantasy I wanted fulfilled. It was movie-night. When he asked me what I wanted to watch, I replied with one word: “porn.” I said it a little too casually, but the look on his face was priceless. At first, he laughed, but when he saw my serious expression, his face turned giddy. He was quite accommodating, too.

He, like many men, stored an array of his own sexual fantasies on his computer, but I knew what I wanted. I had done my homework. Prior to that night, I searched adult sites until I found a video that illustrated what I wanted him to do to me. When we were together, I grabbed his computer mouse, found the video and hit play. As the scene progressed, I whispered in his ear, “I'd like to try that.”

Easy As Pie

If you're shy, it's easier to use a visual tool to tell your partner what you want. Visual aids ease the awkward talk, and some specialized videos give step-by-step instructions, from everything to positioning to lubricant ideas. (SEE: Visual Guides Through Sexual Fantasies)

Do not be afraid to share your fantasies with your significant other. If you can't communication with your partner about what turns you on, then whom can you tell? What's the reason for your having fantasies if they never become fulfilled?